Frustrated.

Today I went to do court support for Mariah Lopez with two friends. The judge wa sso grumpy old man as usual. same depressing shit. Se didnt get a lowered bail, despite suicide attempts, court support, etc.
I annoucned to my friends that I was moving to Illinois. Both told me shitty things about Chicago like the cold weather for example. It almost gave me second thoughts about staying. Thinking how much I'm a msis everyone in New York and activism and thediversity, fucking Chinese food, etc.

Then I went to the FIERCE! meeting. I am so used to being in anarchist settings that to be in a non-anarchist setting seemed so stuffy to me. Not to say FIERCE! is stuff it's certianly not, but it also most defintly isn't anarcho-casual. One thing about them is right on though; THEY GET SHIT DONE.They are very communtiy orietned and organized. I think us anarcho casual folks could learn a bit from them and they can leanr a bit from us (such as consensus).
While at FIERCE!I saw a vide on the Pier. and That just confirmed my need to move from New York. I hate how gentrified it has become. How by enforcing a curfew and such giving the police libertie to keep pushing people out of what was ours. Same thing with the West Village, East Village, Brooklyn. I wouldnt if in the next few years even the Bronx is a hipster playground. Thanks Guliani, Pataki, Bloomberg.

It just reinforces how much I truley feel the need to leave New York.
I keep thinking of how government keeps pushing out queers, people of color, the working class, anarchists from the city systematically the same way they push out animals from their forest homes for profit. How easy that connection is. There are so many paralells on so many struggles.
I dont think Chicago is gentirfication free. But there is no permit law. There is no need for a permit to take pictures.
It keeps getting worst and this uphill battle gets so depressing sometimes because I honetly don't know what to do.
Maybe I need to just not see it for a bit. I don't know.